Orange.

I couldn't think of a post title.. So yeah.


Anyway.

...


I've done more thinking in the past couple of days than I have in the past couple of years. I'm a reasonably intelligent young lad, and the brain cells not destroyed by alcohol are very responsive. So why is it that, for awhile at least, I was able to think placing all my faith in a woman was a good idea. I mean, only applying to colleges near her?

I'm not saying that it's a bad idea (Mike, Jenna, I apparently have to mention you every once in awhile), but I'm not sure I've found that special someone. But, maybe I have..

I've no idea. This debate will continue to tear me apart. I think I'm just looking for someone, and she's available. That's a horrible thing to say.. I know.

For the first time in my life, I'm actually thinking of dumping Rachel West... For no reason. We're going along just fine. Some bumps, but that's normal. We've both hurt the other, so we're taking it slow. I'm just not feeling for her what I used to feel... Deep down I'm wondering if she's even worth talking to.. I know, another horrible thing to say..

And so, I've decided this:

I WILL NOT ONLY BE APPLYING TO SCHOOLS NEAR RACHEL.

I've decided that it's not worth gambling my future. I will apply to schools near her, in case I decide she's the one... The odds of that are pretty slim though.

At this point I think I'd much rather go near a friend of mine, any one of my five best.. I've asked them to give me information, and so I wait.